The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show
by Gracewolf
Summary: YAY! I'm finally done! It took a while, but I'm finally done! YAY! YAY! YAY! Thanks to everyone who reviewed! ^_^ Please R&R.
1. Disclaimer

The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show  
  
RG's Disclaimer: I do not own the Yu-Gi-Oh staff (unfortunately), the weird 'Jack' person from Jack in the Box commercials, a decent pair of socks, the Escaflowne cast, the DBZ cast, the Gundam Wing cast, the cast of CCS (Card Captor Sakura), a car, laundry detergent, a house, or Seto Kaiba *sniffles*  
  
Seto: Hey! Aren't I part of the Yu-Gi-Oh cast?  
  
RG: Well. technically, yes. But. you're just so kawaii in your sweet little trench coat (which I want) and with that adorably, well, adorable serious look on your face, that I decided to give you your own space of un-owned- ness. *Grins innocently before glomping Seto, latching onto his leg and huggling him*  
  
Set: *is huggled* Help. me. O.o  
  
RG: *laughs and huggles him some more* Awwww. isn't he cute? ^_^  
  
  
  
RG: Oh, before I forget. *Pulls sheet off a really big box to reveal a glass case. It contains Téa, Tristain, Malik, Pegasus, and any Yami forms other than Bakura's and Yugi's* *Walks in a couple circles before turning her back to the case's side and giving it a 'small', 'accidental' push with her foot. Thus sending it flying off a cliff and into an incredibly active volcano before looking back to where the case had been* Whoops. did I do that? *Whistles innocently* Sorry, but this story contains none of the characters I just 'accidentally' pushed off a cliff except for maybe a surprise appearance or a flash back. There are several other unlisted characters, but I don't feel like listing them, so there!  
  
RG: Okay, this is the FINAL thing I'm going to say before the fic starts, well, actually, a final few things, or should I say a final list? Aw, whatever:  
  
1) Yugi and Yami are two separate entities (as in, they have separate bodies), the same with any other char/their yami. The reason being that it's two hard to try to huggle someone who's in a soul room.  
  
2) A whole bunch of really messed up stuff will happen/be included in this fic (such as the *gasp* Chibinizer.)  
  
3) If your still there, enjoy the fic and please R&R (Read and review)  
  
See ya! ^_^ ~ RG 


	2. The First Couple

RG's Author's Notes (Brought to you by RG, the person who wrote this): Okay, well, I've already done the disclaimer for this fic, so too bad. Anyway, I have decided to make Yugi the host and some others members of the crew and contestants. I will simply be... well... there, I guess. You know, popping in whenever I'm not wanted and that sort of thing. Well, enjoy! ^_^  
  
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The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show!  
  
Brought to you by Rein aka Gracewolf, problem child extraordinare  
  
*Lots o' applause*  
  
Yugi: *Runs on stage* Thank-you! I'm Yugi, your host for today's show!  
  
*More lots o' applause*  
  
Yugi: Right... Anyway, let me introduce you to our first special guest, Mai!  
  
*Chair swivels around to reveal Mai sitting down, looking at herself in a pocket mirror*  
  
Mai: Huh? Oh, right... *Waves to crowd*  
  
Yugi: Today, Mai will get the chance to go on a great, really expensive mystery date with one of three lucky bachelors!  
  
*Crowd cheers some more*  
  
*Curtain hiding bachelors from the crowd falls back to show Mokuba, Joey, and Bakura (Yami Bakura) tied to their chairs.  
  
Yugi: Okay, Mai, take it away!  
  
Mai: *Nods and looks at cards* Okay, bachelor #1, what's your idea of the perfect date?  
  
Mokuba: Umm... I'd have to say somewhere in late September because it's not too hot and it's not too cold, so you could go to the beach or to the mall or arcade.  
  
Mai: O... kay, then. Bachelor #2, I'll ask you the same question.  
  
Joey: I think the perfect date would be relaxing on the couch with some popcorn and soda while watching a duel monsters or hockey tournament on TV.  
  
Mai: Okay, then. Bachelor #3, if you could travel to anywhere in the world, where would you go?  
  
Bakura: Anywhere but here. Like, say... back to Egypt! *Begins to gnaw on ropes*  
  
RG: *Appears and whacks Bakura on the head really hard*  
  
Bakura: X.X *Is whacked* Ow...  
  
RG: *Disappears*  
  
Mai: My next question is for bachelor #2. What are your four favourite things about your life?  
  
Joey: Let's see... There's sleeping, definitely! There's also hanging with my friends, and... oh ya! Duel monsters and eating!  
  
Mai: Bachelor #1, I'll ask the same question.  
  
Mokuba: That's easy-sugar, ducks, my big brother, and being rich!  
  
Mai: Hmm, I definitely like you. Anyway, bachelor #3, once again, I'll ask you the same question.  
  
Bakura: X.X Wha...? *Still hurting* *Shakes head* I like Gold, jewels, anything expensive, and not getting caught because I have to steal it. Oh, and that was about 5000 years ago. Does it still count?  
  
Mai: *Sighs* I.. guess..  
  
*Buzzer-type noise*  
  
Yugi: Well that's all the questions you can ask today, Mai. So now it's time to choose the bachelor you want to go out with.  
  
Mai: Oh, too easy! I pick... bachelor #1!  
  
Yugi: You've chosen, drum roll please... *Drum roll happens in background* Mokuba Kaiba!  
  
Mai: What?!  
  
Yugi: Have fun on your weeklong cruise, followed by a trip to Money Land, the place where anything is possible if you have cash!  
  
Mai: *Faints*  
  
Mokuba: All right! *Is untied so he can jump a foot off the ground*  
  
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RG's After Story Author's Notes: Sooo what did you think? I know it's kind of bad, but that's because I've never done this kind of thing before. Oh, and don't worry, all the people I claimed not to own in my disclaimer will appear in the fic. ^_^ But, only if I get at least ONE good review so I know that people are actually reading this. And, yes, sadly enough, I do know that it's not very funny. *sniffles* Oh well... I hope you liked it anyway. See ya! ^_^  
  
~ RG 


	3. The Special Couple

RG's Author's Notes (Still brought to you by RG): Okay, first of all, I'd like to send a veerrry incredibly special thanks to Destiny Star, Emerald Phoenix, kiba_fan, Ginny, and Star Dazed Angel for being the first people to review it! ^_^ Yay! *Gives them all a box of sugar-coated, really extremely sweet chocolate, a bar of 'chocolax' (from the 'Iron Giant') for their enemies, and either a puppy named Joey or two plushies of characters from the show (Except Pegasus because I gave them all to the Joey puppies as chew toys). So, I guess I hope you like this one as much as the last part. ^_^ Oh, by the way, today's contestant won't be a character from any Anime... Hehehe...  
  
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The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show! -Part 2  
  
Also still brought to you by Rein aka Gracewolf, problem child extraordinare  
  
*Applause*  
  
Yugi: *Is still standing on stage from last part* *Waves* Hi, again! *Is happy* I'm Yugi and I'm still your host for today's show!  
  
*Applause and cheering*  
  
Yugi: O... kay, then. Anyway, today we have a special guest appearing on the show. Please give a warm welcome to... RG, our very own authoress!  
  
*Applause, cheering, and other such stuff*  
  
RG: *Is extremely very happy* ^_^ *Waves as chair swivels around*  
  
Yugi: Hi, RG! ^_^  
  
RG: Hi, Yugi! ^_^ So, who're the contestants?  
  
Yugi: Sorry, but those are still classified to you until the end. Anyway, today you and your date will win an all expenses paid trip to Florida thanks to Mokuba Kaiba who still has lots of cash left over his date with Mai!  
  
*Lots o' applause, cheering, and other such stuff*  
  
RG: Yay! ^_^  
  
*Curtain, which had been re-raised, falls to reveal the three bachelors, Jack (Jack in the Box), Seto, and Van (Escaflowne) to the crowds random applause and other stuff)*  
  
Yugi: Okay, RG, take it away.  
  
RG: Thanks, Yugi! ^_^ Okay, bachelor #1, what do you think is your greatest talent?  
  
Jack: I'd have to say cooking hamburgers.  
  
RG: Whoa, that's... great... I think. Anyway, bachelor #3, same question.  
  
Van: Hmm.. I guess flying or using Escaflowne.  
  
RG: Okay, then. And, of course, bachelor #2, the same question as before.  
  
Seto: Definitely playing duel monsters or running my multi-million dollar company.  
  
RG: Ooh... multi.... (Don't ask). Huh? *Snaps out of daze* Oh right! Bachelor #3, what's your favourite colour?  
  
Van: I absolutely LOVE black. But, if you don't count black then I'd have to say clear.  
  
RG: Awesome, those are my two favourite colours! So, bachelor #2, you own your own company, right?  
  
Seto: Right..  
  
RG: Well, then, what's your favourite part of owning a company that can before referred to with 'multi'?  
  
Seto: Uhh... I guess my favourite part is my ability to create virtual reality games that allow people to play duel monsters, go on quests, or SMASH PINK BUNNIES! *Insert psycho Seto laugh here*  
  
RG: Are you feeling okay?  
  
Seto: Well, actually, no. Not since that stupid horseman sent those evil bunnies to..  
  
RG: Okay, well that's enough out of you. Bachelor #1, what is your favourite feature about yourself?  
  
Jack: I'd have to say it's my spherical white head and my little, pointed, yellow hat.  
  
RG: Sure.. So, bachelor #3, what's your idea for a dream date?  
  
Van: I wouldn't know, I usually forget my dreams.  
  
Comedic Drum Roll: Ba da ba!  
  
Yugi: Okay, last question.  
  
RG: Okay, bachelor #1, what's your idea of the perfect date - not 'dream' date, just date.  
  
Jack: About the second week of August, for sure because it's usually nice and toasty! ^_^  
  
RG: *Slaps forehead in disgust* I'm sure glad I didn't get around to bachelor #2...  
  
Yugi: Now, RG, it's time to choose your date.  
  
RG: That's easy enough. ^_^ Because he didn't give a stupid answer, or any answer at all, to my last question, I choose bachelor #2! ^_^  
  
*Audience applauses some more*  
  
Yugi: You've chosen.. *Curtain falls* Mr. Seto Kaiba!  
  
Seto: You've got to be kidding me.. -_-U  
  
RG: Yay! *Latches onto Seto's arm and huggles* *Singsong voice* We're going to Florida on your brother's tab! Hehehe-hehe-he! ^_^  
  
Jack: But.. I wanted to go to Florida! V_V  
  
RG: *Smiles really, really big as Seto carries her off stage, mainly because she's attached to his arm*  
  
Van: I really lucked out this time. *Waves to Hitomi, not knowing that she's appearing on the next show*  
  
Yugi: Well that's our show, bye! *Runs off stage while waving* (Actually, it isn't, but Yugi said he always wanted to say it, so I agreed-cute lil' bugger! ^_^)  
  
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More of RG's Author's Notes: I really hope you enjoyed that one as much as the last! ^_^ I'm sorry that I put myself as the main contestant, but I was worried Seto would volunteer before I went on for reasons unknown to me. O.o Big.. words.. So, anyway, I still hope you liked it, and, Seto, yes your still my fave, even if I did call Yugi cute. ^_~  
  
Seto: Well, don't I just feel sooo special. *Words drip with sarcasm*  
  
RG: I know! We're gonna have so much fun in Florida, oh, and then we can get Mokuba to send us to Hawaii. *Notice people still reading* Oh, right! Please R&R and tell me whom, from the Animes I've listed as unowned by me, should contend next. I'm actually going to make a GUY a contestant. Ooh... O.o See ya! ^_^  
  
~RG 


	4. The Somewhat Odd Part

RG's Author's Notes (Brought to you by RG and, of course, Seto Kaiba)  
  
Seto: Help... me...  
  
RG: *Laughs* Isn't he just sooo cute? Anyway, I'd just like to say that this is my last chapter for a little while as I'm going on a short break to actually DO something with my friends.  
  
Seto: Right.. We ALL believe you..  
  
RG: Of course, you do! ^_^ So... I really hope you enjoy this part, too! O.o *Is suddenly frozen and begins to try getting over how many people like it*  
  
Seto: *Sighs and looks at cue card* Please enjoy part 3 of the Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show. And then you can... GET ME AWAY FROM THIS ME-OBSESSED PER.. son... *Is suddenly unconscious thanks to tranquilliser shot*  
  
RG: Now, while he's asleep... *Pulls out bazooka-like machine and points it at Seto* Chibinizer, Away! *Fires and Seto instantly becomes a five-year- old* Aww... kawaii! ^_^   
  
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The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show! -Part 3  
  
Once again, also still brought to you by Rein aka Gracewolf, the writer of fan fiction  
  
*Clapter (I didn't feel like using applause so I improvised with my own word, just like I'll be doing for the rest of this part)*  
  
Yugi: *Get up from chair he was sleeping in and waves, still happy* ^_^ Hello, again, everyone! I'm still Yugi and I'm still your host!  
  
*Clapter and yhistling*  
  
Yugi: Finally, we have a guy as a contestant. Please welcome Yami!  
  
*Huge amounts of Clapter, yhistling, and cheauxplause overflow the stage*  
  
Yami: *Has head duct taped to the back of the chair and his hands/legs bound to the chair* How could you do this to me, Yugi? Not even Ryou's aibou had to put up with his head being taped to the chair.  
  
Yugi: *Shrugs* I know, but, one, you need a date and some time to relax, two, this way you can't get away and, three, there's no way we're taking any chance with you using your shadow powers, so too bad.  
  
Yami: *Sighs* Fine, let's get this over with. -_-U  
  
Yugi: ^_^ Yay! Okay, let's meet our three lovely bachelorettes!  
  
*Curtains that have been re-done so they now pull open, well, pull open, revealing Hitomi (Escaflowne), Bulma (DBZ from before Cell came), and Ruby Moon (CCS)*  
  
*Cheauxplause*  
  
Yami: *Sigh* I.. can.. do this.. *Shudders* Bachelorette #1, where did your favourite vacation take place?  
  
Hitomi: That's easy, Gaea.  
  
Yami: Sure, why not? Not like anything's impossible. Okay, bachelorette #2, what's the worst thing that ever happened to you?  
  
Bulma: Hmm... let's see? There was the time I was turned into a frog, the time I was left all alone on an unknown planet, the time I was burnt to a crisp, the other time I was burnt to a crisp, the other OTHER time I was burnt to a crisp...  
  
Yami: Point taken. Bachelorette #3, what's your greatest talent?  
  
Ruby: Simple enough, flying and magic.  
  
Yami: Okay, then. *Whispers to our adorable little host* Yugi, how did you actually manage to find someone interesting with magic?  
  
Yugi: *Whispering back* Don't look at me, ask RG.  
  
Yami: -_- Bachelorette #2, who was your last big crush?  
  
Bulma: Yamcha... *Dreamy look/far away voice*  
  
Yami: Right... Bachelorette #1, I'll ask the same question.  
  
Hitomi: *Equally dreamy look/voice* Van...  
  
Yami: Wasn't he a past contestant in the show?  
  
Hitomi: Yeah.. he was...  
  
Yami: All right.. bachelorette #3, where would you go on the perfect date?  
  
Ruby: Anywhere dark and mysterious is the perfect place for a date.  
  
Yami: Actually, I was talking about the second week in August.  
  
Ruby: *Face falls*  
  
Yugi: Actually, Yami, that wasn't very funny.  
  
Yami: Yeah, I know, but that's what it says on the card.  
  
Yugi: *Looks* O.o  
  
Yami: Okay, bachelorette #1, what's your best talent?  
  
Hitomi: Fortune telling.  
  
Yami: O.o *Whispers* Sounds more like someone for Bakura... (Non-yami Bakura is referred to as Ryou) Bachelorette #2, what's your favourite pass- time?  
  
Bulma: Just standing around whining, I guess (Sorry Bulma fans), or maybe working on some mechanical junk.  
  
Yami: Sure...  
  
Yugi: Okay, Yami, last question.  
  
Yami: Bachelorette #3, what's your favourite food?  
  
Ruby: Usually, I don't eat.  
  
Yami: O.o  
  
Joey: *Somehow ended up walking by-whispers* Oh, man, she's perfect. Go for it.  
  
Yami: Get lost, Joey! *Somehow sends Joey to the shadow realm and then transports him backstage*  
  
Yugi: Well, Yami, it's now time to choose your lucky date!  
  
Yami: I pick.. bachelorette #... nothing! *Insert crazy Yami laugh here* *Eye on forehead glows and his bindings/duct tape disappear* *Runs but is captured and is tossed back into the (insert spooky music) 'Cage of People Yet to Go On a Date' (Dun, dun, dunnnn)*  
  
RG: *Laughs threateningly and tosses keys to one of her many look-alike Joey puppies who swallows them, then realises* Hey, wait a minute! Joey, hey, Joey! *All the puppies look at her* Doh! Joey that just swallowed those keys, please come back! Those were.. my house... keys... *Whimpers as Yami then laughs, before the keys abruptly appear in the air* You forget, Yami, that I have authoress power on my side! ^_^  
  
Yami: Doh!  
  
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RG's Authoress Notes Yet to Come (Brought to you by RG and, of course, Chibi Kaiba): Hi, again! As you can see, Seto no longer hates me. It's quite the opposite, in fact.  
  
Seto: *Walks up and jumps in RG's arms* You nice, pwetty lady. ^_^  
  
RG: Awww... isn't he just sooo kawaii! ^_^ *Huggles* Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the latest part. I know it's kind of messed that Yami escaped, but I figured someone might want him at the end of the fic, so I let him 'escape'.  
  
Seto: *Smiles and nods* Yami wee-yord. ^_^  
  
RG: Sooo cute! ^_^ Anyway, once again, I hope you enjoyed it and please, as always, R&R. Also, like in the last part, please suggest characters from the Animes I have listed in my disclaimer for the show. Thanks, don't forget that I won't be back for a couple days. *Gasps at the thought of two whole days without posting any more fics before laughing* Like I'll be able to hold out that long. Anyway, see ya! ^_^  
  
Seto: Bwye-bwye. ^_^   
  
~ RG & Chibi Seto 


	5. The Somewhat Confusing Finalé that Inclu...

RG's Authoress Notes (Brought to You by RG, Chibi Seto Kaiba, and the Wondrous Chibinizer!): Hi! Yay! Two days have passed! Actually, I posted the chapter of a new story last night-oh well! ^_^ It's called 'Chibi House of Horrors' if anyone's interested. It stars me and...  
  
Set: ME! ^_^  
  
RG: Yep! Me an' Seto. Anyway, hope you enjoy today's part! But, before we cut to the show, I have a gift to give Pugash! *Pulls out smaller version of Chibinizer with 'For Pugash, may your chibi fun never end-from RG' engraved on the side and gives it to her* have fun! ^_^ By the way, I'll be handing out free autographed Chibinizers, which are the property of me, to any reviewers at the end of the show. They're good for five changes into chibi and four reversals. ^_^   
  
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The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show -Part 4  
  
Brought to you by the Chibinizer, an author's best friend  
  
*Applause*  
  
Yugi: *Crawls out from under contestant's chair* Hi, everyone! Because RG said so, this will be the final part before the last one, where a whole bunch of un-dated characters will be given out! Also, there may be a sequel- type-thing where we will be interviewing all of our contestants about their dates and, of course, we will look into the dates. ^_^ Anyway, let me introduce our final contestant to you!  
  
*Lots o' applause*  
  
*'Motivation' by Sum 41 suddenly starts playing*  
  
Everyone: O.o  
  
Yugi: Right... Anyway, please welcome.. *Contestant chair swivels around* Tristain Taylor!  
  
Audience: *Boos*  
  
Tristain: -_-  
  
Yugi: Look on the bright side, this way, no one will be sad when he leaves on his date to McDonalds... *Looks at crowd and gulps* All right, all right! It was a joke! Like we'd EVER agree to let Tristain, the lifeless, personality-less Taylor participate! Our real contestants are Syaoran and Yukito from.. what the *beep (wow, our first chance to test the censors)*? They're not even from Yu-Gi-Oh; they're from CCS! What's going on here?  
  
RG: Well, umm... I like them, so, umm... they're contestants.  
  
Yugi: *Glares*  
  
RG: *Is suddenly surrounded by flame with large spears of ice jabbing up behind them as her wardrobe suddenly changes to something similar to Spawns (don't own that) and her eyes turn acid green* *In unearthly, demonic voice* Now then, what were you saying about them participating? *Towers over Yugi*  
  
Yugi: Meep! *Cowers* Nothing! Nothing at all!  
  
RG: That's better. Now, let's get back to the show, shall we?  
  
Yugi: O.. okay...  
  
*Curtain that had been closed opens to reveal six people sitting in chairs*  
  
People in order of #: Pegasus (Bunny Cartoons), Sakura (CCS), Chi-chi (DBZ), Heero (GW), Tomoyo (CCS), and a box of laundry detergent with a sock pulled over the top (The Evil House of me).  
  
Crowd: *Begins to snicker*  
  
Yugi: Well, Syaoran, why don't you start? I'm calling you Li for the rest of the show, by the way.  
  
Li: Okay, bachelorette #1, what is your favourite pass-time?  
  
Pegasus: *Has a voice-converter thing to make his voice sound feminine* I'd have to say watching cartoons.  
  
Yugi: Your turn, Yukito.  
  
Yukito: Bachelorette #2, what is your greatest talent?  
  
Sakura: I guess cheerleading, running, capturing Clow cards or maybe getting used as a cup-holder by my older brother...  
  
Li: Bachelorette #2, you sound veerrry familiar. Anyway, bachelorette #3, what was your greatest talent as a child?  
  
Chi-chi: Tai kwon do-type stuff I guess... (Sorry, but I haven't watched to show in a looonnng time)  
  
Yukito: All I can relate to is food, sooo... bachelorette #4, what's your favourite food?  
  
Heero: *Is tied to chair and also has a voice-converter* *Struggles* Anything as along as I can get out of here!  
  
Li: Very weird people here today.  
  
Yukito: I don't think so.  
  
RG: Neither do I! *Smiles triumphantly as Li falls out of chair in surprise* ^_^  
  
Li: *Glares but sits back down* Bachelorette #5, who is your favourite person in the world and why?  
  
Tomoyo: Sakura Avalon because she's my best friend and she lets me video tape almost everything she does. ^_^  
  
Li: Whoa, I think I know who your are.  
  
Tomoyo: ^_^  
  
Yukito: Alright, bachelorette #6, who's your favourite actor or actress?  
  
BOLDWSPOT (Box of laundry detergent with a sock pulled over the top): *Is possessed* Definitely the box in the 'Tide' commercials. *Drool*  
  
Yukito: Well... that's a different answer.  
  
Yugi: Okay, you two, you each can ask three more questions.  
  
Li: Bachelorette #2, if you could go out with anyone in the world, who would it be?  
  
Sakura: I guess I'd have to say Yukito.  
  
Li: But, if you're who I think... T_T *Runs off crying*  
  
Yugi/RG/Yukito: O.o  
  
Yukito: I guess I'll just ask one more question, as well. Bachelorette #4, what's your profession?  
  
Heero: *Still struggling* I'm an incredibly angry assassin whose about ready to rip RG's h... *Is knocked out*  
  
RG: *Hides giant mallet behind back* What?  
  
Yugi: O... kay, then. Anyway, since Li left, I guess it's just you who gets to pick a date, Yuki.  
  
Yukito: Okay, I choose bachelorette #.. 6! ^_^  
  
Yugi; You've chosen... a box of laundry detergent with a sock covering the top.  
  
*Other curtain falls*  
  
Yukito: Ahhhhhhhhh! *Runs away, but, like Li and yami, is captured and thrown into cage once more*  
  
BOLDWSPOT: *Sniffles* T.T  
  
Yugi: Okay, and that's our show for today! We ask that all reviewers please post who they'd like to get for free that hasn't gone on a date. They must have either appeared on the show or be from Yu-Gi-Oh. Thanks again, bye! *Runs off stage while waving* ^_^  
  
Bachelorettes (at least some of them were girls): *Carried of-stage and tossed into cage with others*  
  
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RG's Authoress Notes (Still brought to you by RG and Chibi Set): Well that's it-our big finale. Sorry it didn't contain that many Yu-Gi-Oh chars, but I was running out of ideas and I absolutely REFUSE to allow Téa to come on MY (and Seto's ^_^) show! *Rips head off Téa doll and then throws both halves to a pack of Joey puppies who just so happened to run by* Good boys! ^_^  
  
Seto: Mean lady go bwye-bwye! ^_^  
  
RG: That is correct, mine little amigo. Sooo, please post the info. Yugi asked for above in your review so I can get you the right char. Also, since I can't even remember if I said one comment at the beginning of this part and I'm too lazy to check, I'd just like to (actually, I think I DID already say this-oh well) 'remind' you that I'll be making a sort of 'talk show' sequel to this and, maybe, I'll make an actual dating game show sequel, too. So, please R&R and I'll be seeing ya! ^_^  
  
Seto: Bwye-bwye! ^_^   
  
~ RG and Chibi Seto 


	6. The Final Chapter That's really Long, Co...

RG's Authoress Notes (Brought to you by the same people that bring it to you every part - RG and chibi Seto ^_^): Hi! Welcome to the final part of the Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show! ^_^ Today's really special because, instead of actually having an actual game show, we'll be giving away people who participated, except, of course, the original Seto Kaiba and anyone who actually went on a date! It's also special because all of our wonderful reviewers will get a free mini Chibinizer good for five chibinizations and four reversals before they self-destruct! Not only that, but they're also signed by me, Seto, and a lot people who claim to have 'helped' our show in some way. Anyway, please enjoy our final part. Before I forget and just end up confusing you more, if you didn't request a character, your requested char wasn't on the show and isn't on the cast of Yu-Gi-Oh, or you requested a char who actually went on a date, you'll receive three free uses on your mini Chibinizer. You'll get a clone if your requested char is already taken.  
  
Seto: Otay, now, on with da show! ^_^  
  
RG: ^_^ That's right!   
  
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- ~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~~-~-~-  
  
The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show -Part 5  
  
Brought to you by 'The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show -Part 4'  
  
*Applause*  
  
RG: Runs out on stage with Seto. *Waves* ^_^ Hi, everyone, I'm RG and I'll be your host for this part!  
  
*Crickets chirp for a couple seconds before the audience glares and they stop*  
  
RG: O.o  
  
Seto: O.o  
  
SRGA (Some Random Guy/Girl in the Audience): *Yells* Hey! What happened to Yugi?!  
  
RG: -_- *Sigh* I was hoping it wouldn't come down to this... *Pulls on rope that just sort of appeared*  
  
Trap Door: *Opens*  
  
SRGA: *Falls* Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!  
  
RG: ^_^  
  
Audience: O.O  
  
Seto: *Grins evilly and pushes button that just sort of appeared*  
  
Trap Door: *Flames fly out*  
  
SRGA: Ahh! No! Not.. not Barney! Please, anything but Barney! Nooo!!!  
  
Trap Door: *Closes and disappears*  
  
RG: O.o Anyway... Today, Yugi won't be hosting the show because, obviously, he'll be given away along with everyone else. Oh yeah, I'll also be holding a drawing to decide whom I'll be giving Téa and Pegasus away to so that they can be tortured! ^_^ Also, I'll be giving away random stuff throughout the show!  
  
Audience: Yay. -_-  
  
Seto: *Threatens with button*  
  
*Wild applause/cheering*  
  
RG: Okay, now that we've got everything ready and explained, let's start the show! *Pulls on rope and a curtain swings open, showing the entire cast of Yu-Gi-Oh (Except Seto, Mai, and Mokuba) gagged and tied randomly by their ankles and wrists to a wall*  
  
Seto: Time to start now...  
  
Yu-Gi-Oh Cast: *Eyes go wide and they shake their heads wildly, trying to say something*  
  
RG: Well, now that we've got everything cleared up, let's start the show!  
  
Seto: First off, we gots Pugash, who gets a cwone of mes! ^_^  
  
RG: That's ri-ight! ^_^ *Yells* BRING OUT THE CLONES!  
  
Stage Crew-Type Peoples: *Wheel out a large case full of exact replicas of all the Yu-Gi-Oh chars.  
  
RG: Thanks, you may go... Anyway, these are highly developed clones and, although not quite as perfectly wonderful as their originals, they're incredibly close. The only difference is that we can alter their minds just enough so that they'll like you.. a lot.  
  
Seto: Yay! ^_^  
  
RG: So, Pugash, here you go, one near perfect Seto clone, courtesy of us, and completely chibinizable, too. ^_^ *Hands Pugash a mini Chibinizer* Have fun..  
  
Seto: Okays, next is Star Dwazed Angel.  
  
RG: That's right! Ryou, feel very special, you're getting out...  
  
Ryou: Yay!  
  
RG: ... Because we're giving you to Star Dazed Angel! ^_^  
  
Ryou: Nooo! T.T  
  
RG: Yes! Now, here's your complimentary Chibinizer, leash, collar, and ID tags. Enjoy your Ryou! ^_^  
  
Ryou: Please, no! Please! *Is dragged out* Nooo!  
  
RG: Whoa, he's as bad as the Random Guy/Girl in the Audience. O.o  
  
Seto: O.o  
  
RG: Right.. Okay, our next lucky winner is.. Hot Ice (Returns, and her muses. All right, sooo. here's Yugi, and you get a complimentary Yami to go with him.  
  
Yami/Yugi: Nooo!  
  
Seto: Yes! ^_^  
  
RG: Oh and here are their ID tags, collars, and leashes. Don't forget your Chibinizer, either. Enjoy yourselves! ^_^  
  
Yami: I'll get you for this, RG!  
  
Yugi: How could you do this? I was your host! Your host, RG, your host!  
  
Seto: Sure.. Next up is.. husspwuppy24. ^_^  
  
RG: Cutie! Anyway... *Begins snuggling Seto in all his cuteness* *Looks up* Oh, right, sorry about that. Seto's just a little too cute right now. Okay, hushpuppy24 has requested Li.  
  
Syaoran (Li): *Is brought out* *Struggles* Hey, you can't do this to me! I'm not even FROM Yu-Gi-Oh! I demand to call my agent! Or my mother.. or even a Clow card! Let... go... of me... NOW! *Struggles*  
  
RG: I guess you'd better let him go. -_- Otherwise, we won't be able to give 'im away.  
  
Syaoran: O.O Uh-oh..  
  
RG: Okay, hp24 (I hope you don't mind me abbreviating it), here's his ID tags, leash, and collar. Enjoy!  
  
Syaoran: Help.. me.. O.O  
  
Seto: RG wants me to wet you all knows to stwick around after the show for a spwecial tweat.  
  
RG: That's correct! Okay, before we carry on, in my random way of doing things in complete randomness, I'd like to hold a short intermission to recognise absolutely everyone who reviewed so they'll be know and I'll be able to give out these Chibinizers much more quickly! List please. *Is handed list* Well, here they are, in order of posts:  
  
Destiny Star  
  
Emerald Phoenix  
  
kiba_fan  
  
Ginny  
  
Mimi-Chan  
  
Star Dazed Angel  
  
Elvish Violinist of Ra  
  
Yami Mau  
  
EWP - Teako and Azeroth  
  
Pugash  
  
Sincere Angel  
  
Rosz  
  
  
  
Dragon's Princess  
  
Midnight Sun  
  
LiLbAbEeBloo  
  
hushpuppy24  
  
Hot Ice (Returns  
  
Manda-Chan  
  
Seto-Sama Lover  
  
mangameep  
  
Sarah aka Celebi  
  
Kaiya the Tiger Demon  
  
Meitantei Kudo KID  
  
*Blank space*  
  
shikonjewel  
  
Evil Sugarysweetness  
  
Gokus girl  
  
Rinoa Tillmitt  
  
MI  
  
bunny  
  
Thanks for posting, everybody! *Gives everyone a Chibinizer* Okay, then, now on with the show! ^_^ Seto, please tell everyone who's next?  
  
Seto: Sure! Next up is... Manda-Tan and she gwets Mawik. ^_^  
  
RG: Okay, Malik, you're free to go.  
  
Malik: Yes!  
  
RG: With Manda-Chan. ^_^  
  
Malik: What?! You have got to be kidding me! *Struggles as he's dragged away* Anything but this! T.T  
  
RG: Sorry, but, one- I love repeating messed up, incredible unfunny stuff and, two- you have absolutely no choice because I made a promise to my reviewers and now I have to keep it. Sorry. *Unbolts the chair Malik's holding onto from the floor* Here's his stuff, Manda-Chan and, please, feel free to keep the chair. ^_^ *Waves* Bye Malik!  
  
Malik: *Is pulled back stage*  
  
Seto: Bwye-bwye! ^_^  
  
RG: Hmm.. Looks like we've got another clone to give away... BRING OUT THE RYOU CLONE!  
  
Ryou Clone: *Is brought out*  
  
RG: Perfect! Okay, here ya go, mangameep. One premium Ryou clone who is guaranteed to never run-away, bite, or claw/chew the furniture. Please enjoy and don't worry about a collar or lead-he doesn't need one, unlike some people.  
  
*A curtain falls to show Joey in a cage, wearing a muzzle, with a whole bunch of puppies*  
  
Joey: *Glares*  
  
RG: *Does the evil act*  
  
Joey: *Whimpers*  
  
RG: Much better. Seto, who's next?  
  
Seto: Next up, Sawah aka Cewebi wants Yami Mawik.  
  
RG: Sure! ^_^ BRING OUT YAMI MALIK!  
  
*Screaming can be heard*  
  
Screaming: Ahhhh!!!!!  
  
*Whap! Crunch! *  
  
Yami Malik: Owww... *Climbs out of hole in floor* That... hurt just a little too much...  
  
RG: ^_^ Well, here he is. Have fun with him, even if you already do illegally own him. ^_^ *Hands Sarah the leash*  
  
Yami Malik: *beep* *beep, beep* *beeeeep*  
  
Seto: Watch it! There's is kwids here!  
  
RG: Sooo cyute! ^_^ *Suddenly realises that people are looking at her funny* -_- Anyway, next up is Kaiya the Tiger Tamer who gets Yami Bakura! ^_^ Before we bring him out, though, here's everything you'll need. Also, I thought we could look at a quick slide show of he and Ryou. BRING OUT THE SLIDES, PROJECTOR, AND BACKDROP!  
  
*Everything appears*  
  
RG: Thanks, now please.. DIM THE LIGHTS!  
  
*Lights dim*  
  
RG: Okay, let's start the show! ^_^  
  
*The slide show starts..  
  
First slide - Bakura's baby picture (Taken while facing his back, he's looking over his shoulder and grinning evilly).  
  
Second slide - Same picture, different angle (Picture is sideways with a limp hand lying in foreground).  
  
Third slide - Bakura's school photo (Bakura is sitting normally in front of the backdrop with several unconscious people lying around his stool and his millennium ring glowing through his shirt).  
  
Fourth slide - Bakura at the Beach (Bakura is sitting happily making a sandcastle).  
  
Fifth slide - Bakura and Ryou at the beach (Bakura has moved to the side of his castle to reveal Ryou's head in the drawbridge door).  
  
Sixth slide - Bakura's and Ryou's first dates (Ryou is standing next to Bakura with his arm draped over a girl's shoulder and Bakura is holding out a card whose face is replaced with a young woman's). *  
  
Seto: O.o Cweepy...  
  
RG: No kidding. Anyway, feel free to take the slides, oh and here's Yami Bakura. *Drop's a struggling Yami Bakura, who just sort of materialised out of nowhere, at Kaiya's feet* Have fu-un... ^_^  
  
Bakura: Nooo! You'll be hearing from my agent!  
  
RG: What agent? Seto dropped a fridge on him this morning remember?  
  
Bakura: No, I WAS PASSED OUT BECAUSE YOU BEAT ME WITH YOUR STUPID MALLET!  
  
RG: Oh, right. Well, enjoy yourself, Bakura!  
  
Bakura: Grr...  
  
Seto: ^_^ Next up is... Meitantei Kudo KID who wants Yami.  
  
RG: *Pulls out Yami clone* ^_^ Sorry, but Yami is already taken, so you can have this clone instead. Enjoy yourself and bring him back if something goes wrong. The first replacement is free.  
  
Seto: Is true. Nest up is azeroth and teako who is eating ham.  
  
RG: O.o *Shudders at the thought of a curse of dragon raised by someone who likes ham so much*  
  
Seto: O.o *Feels her forehead*  
  
RG: -_-U Well, anyway, because you're special, you get a Ryou clone AND a wheelbarrow full of ham. *Pulls stuff out* Gee, I hope it's enough.  
  
Seto: *Pushes button* ^_^  
  
Wheelbarrow: *Turns into a Mac truck*  
  
RG: Much better. *Helps Ryou clone into truck and waves as they go to park it* Seto?  
  
Seto: Yeah, RG?  
  
RG: Where did you get that truck and how did it fit through the door to the parking lot?  
  
Seto: No idea. I duess it's movie mwagic.  
  
RG: Well, why not? ^_^ *Whips out a Bakura clone* Okay, next up is shikonjewel, and she requested Bakura!  
  
Seto: But we alweady gave away Batura.  
  
RG: -_-U I know, that's why we're giving her a Bakura clone, instead, AND three extra uses of her Chibinizer to thank her for the love spray.  
  
Seto: Ooooh... Awight, then. *Waves* Bwye, Batura cwone!  
  
RG: Well, we only have a few more people to give away before the draw, so let's finish fast.  
  
Cast: NO! HELP US! DON'T LET HER DO THI- *Get re-gagged*  
  
Seto: *Pushes button again* *Yugi and Yami clones appear* For Rikku an' EES. *Pushes button again*  
  
Yugi/Yami clones: *Transported to their new owners*  
  
RG: Good job, Seto. ^_^  
  
Seto: Mes is fast. ^_^  
  
RG: That you are. But, it's my turn, now. *Pulls rope* *Two Yugi clones appear* Coolies, ne?  
  
SORGA (Some Other Random Guy/Girl in the Audience): Ne!  
  
RG: *Pulls rope*  
  
Seto: *Pushes button*  
  
SORGA: Ahhhh! Teletubies! Nooo!  
  
RG: *Shudders* Any-way, these Yugi clone are for Gokus Girl and her friend.  
  
Seto: Wes knows you only wanted him for your fwiend, but now you gots one too! ^_^  
  
RG: Uh-huh. ^_^ Just sooo considerate, aren't we?  
  
Cast: NO!  
  
RG: Seto, if you please...  
  
Seto: *Grins and nods before tossing our lovely hostess, moi, something*  
  
Cast: T.T *Pass out from numerous concussions* X.X  
  
RG: *Attempting to hide trademark giant blue and yellow mallet behind back* What?  
  
RFGTP (Random Fan-Girl-Type-People): *Accusing stares and/or evil glares*  
  
Noise: THWACK!  
  
RFGTP: X.X *Very flat*  
  
RG: *Still trying to hide mallet* *Smiles innocently* Wonder how that happened...  
  
Seto: -_-... ^_^ Anyway! Next up is.. MI! She gets a Seto cwone! Yay!  
  
RG: That's ri-ight! BRING OUT THE SETO CLONE!  
  
Seto clone: *Is brought out* *Smiles and waves*  
  
RG: As great as the real thing! ^_^  
  
Seto: *Sniffles* Weally?  
  
RG: Well... almost, but not quite! ^_^  
  
Seto: Yay! ^_^  
  
RG: *Hands MI the Seto clone* ^_^ I hope you enjoy your new, premium, state- of-the-art Seto clone courtesy of us, the people who swear that we know what we're doing (Of course, we also claim that our products are fool proof, yet look who's giving them out).  
  
Seto: Now, before wes is done with da peoples, pwease welcome da AMAZING DANCING, SINGING PINK BUNNIES AND DEIR COMRADES, THE KICKBOXING CYOTES! ^_^  
  
*A bunch of pink, fluffy bunnies come dancing on stage in little tuxes and begin to do something like the can-can while a bunch of coyotes begin to kick-box in the background, which, of course, proves that it's a BAD idea to not feed large wild dogs before they have to go through a hard, physical excersize*  
  
Bunnies: *Gulp*  
  
Bunny 1: Can we talk about this? Eh-he.  
  
Bunny 2: Yeah, like, maybe over the phone or through a radio talk show? Please?  
  
Coyotes: *Stare and grin*  
  
Bunnies: RUN! *Well, er... they run*  
  
*Meanwhile*  
  
RG: *Pulling on hair* OW! Wow, who would've thought that hurt so much.. *Shakes head* I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT TO FEED THOSE STUPID RAPID DOGS! Also, I'm having trouble believing that I actually forgot to give away whole bunch of free stuff.. er... CUT TO COMMERCIAL SO I CAN FIGURE THIS OUT!  
  
*Cuts to commercial*  
  
Commercial:  
  
Some Woman's Soft Voice: Are you in need of companionship? Do you long to spend cold nights cuddled under a warm, soft blanket? Do you need a friend? Maybe, do you need nicer, cleaner smelling clothes? Well, then, you need...  
  
PCPGOHH (Psycho Chick with a Paper Bag Over Her Head): *Jumps in front of camera which, until now, had been circling floaty, red and white silk scarves (The words will be put in, in front of them after)* A BOX OF LAUNDRY DETERGENT WITH THE TOP CONVERED BY A SOCK! Yes, That's Right, Folks! Now, You Too Can Experience The Joys Of One Of The Many Messed Up, Pointless Props Contained in The Yu-Gi-Oh Dating Show! ^_^ (Really, she IS smiling, you just... can't... see it... never mind -_-...)  
  
*Back to show*  
  
RG: *Fake show-host smile with spookily white, sparkly teeth* Hi, and welcome back. Right after we give out the last char, we will give out a whole bunch of random stuff. Then we'll give stuff to people who didn't get a char and we'll have the draw that everyone's been waiting for. Seto, please tell our loving audience and reviewers who our final char-getting person is.  
  
Person Who Thinks He's a Ghost: *Wearing sheet and attempting to walk through a couple of fold-up chairs* *Snorts*  
  
RG: O.o I'll just act like I never saw that.  
  
Seto: Awight! The final person is... bunny! She gets a Mawik cwone. ^_^  
  
RG: Yay! BRING OUT THE MALIK CLONE!  
  
Malik Clone: *Is brought out* *Grins*  
  
RG: Okay, here's your almost perfectly perfected, near perfect Malik clone. Enjoy! ^_^ Oh, and thanks for the... singing tofu bacon. I'm sure that I'll really enjoy it.  
  
*Messed up game-show music*  
  
Seto: This is a game show?  
  
RG: Not that I know of.  
  
Seto: Verwy cweepy. O.O  
  
RG: I totally agree. O.O ... *Slaps head* Anyway, today our audience members will receive free failed clone experiments who may turn rabid any second! Also, they will receive free services from a local funeral home. ^_^U Some of our audience members (such as the creepy guy in a sheet who I'm pretending to have never seen) will also receive a large thwack, smash, crash, and any other sound of pain and/or hitting something hard to the head thanks to my giant blue and yellow cartoon mallet that I'm not hiding behind my back (It's behind Seto's). ^_^  
  
Audience: O.O Uh-oh...  
  
RG: *Gulps* Well, I was just looking through my fic and reviews and realised that I ACTUALLY MISSED SOMEONE! Gomen, Mimi-Chan! I'm sooo sorry! Because I actually managed to miss you and I'm too lazy to go back to the beginning and rewrite part the fic, I'll give you a bunch of STUFF! ^_^ Okay, I'll give you a Ryou clone, a Joey puppy, no, TWO Joey puppies, three extra uses on your Chibinizer, and a picture that chibi Seto drew that's autographed by me and him in yellow crayon. I hope that this'll make it up to you. Sorry, again, but, now, I must return to giving everyone else their free three free Chibinizer uses.  
  
Seto: Shakes head.  
  
RG: *Smiles sheepishly* *Adds three extra uses to the Chibinizers of Destiny Star, Emerald Phoenix, kiba_fan, Ginny, Mimi-Chan, Elvish Violinist of Ra, Yami Mau, Sincere Angel, Rosz, Dragon's Princess, Midnight Sun, LiLbAbEeBloo, Seto-Sama Lover, *Blank Space Person* (No name), and Rinoa Tillmitt* Whew, finally done. Okay, please cut to the singing and dancing pink bunnies and the kick boxing coyotes while I select the winners for the draw. By the way, the torture must take place in the reviews by the two winners because I refuse to allow any more pain in my fic until I say so. *Waits ten seconds* Okay, now I'll allow more. Anyway... CUE THE RABBITS AND COYOTES!  
  
Seto: *Sighs* Not verwy pwetty sight... *Pushes button*  
  
*Bunnies and coyotes area*  
  
Coyotes: *Lying around lazily, their muzzles covered a red substance*  
  
(I'll just let you try to figure this one out on your own......... Hmm.. On second thought, I think I'll just tell you. *Backs away from outraged audience and readers*)  
  
Bunny 3 (As you recall, Bunnies 1/2 already did something): *Comes out with a tray holding a large lump covered in a red substance much like that covering the coyotes' muzzles* M-m-m-more.. fries, s-sir?  
  
Coyote: *Grins and nods* Finally, you remembered to lather them with ketchup! ^_^ *Takes some* You should try some - these are great!  
  
Bunny 3: *Shakes his head and leaves without the tray*  
  
(What? You didn't honestly think that I'd let those coyotes actually HURT the bunnies, did you? Of course not! The thought never even crossed my mind, well, at least, not for long, it didn't...)  
  
*Back with RG and Seto*  
  
RG: -_-U Well, that was, umm...  
  
Seto: O.O Bunnies...  
  
RG: Whoa, I guess Pegasus isn't the reason you don't like bunnies... O.o  
  
Seto: *Snaps out of it* Sooo...  
  
RG: Right, right, the draw. Okay, the winner of the Pegasus beating contest is, or rather, are Teako and Azeroth! ^_^ *Gives them each a multi-coloured cartoon mallet to use during the time that their prize is being carried out* Please enjoys yourselves and be sure to put those mallets to extremely good use! ^_^  
  
Seto: Yay! Whose next, RG? ^_^  
  
RG: *Still grinning evilly* Next up is the winner of the Téa beating contest. The winner is... Evil Sugary Sweetness! ^_^ *Gibes ESS a large cartoon mallet with gold, silver, and bronze swirls covering it* Shiny... Huh? Oh, right, take care not to hit Téa too hard - this is an expensive mallet and I don't want it to dent. But, then again, it's pretty strong, so go right ahead and sock it to her! ^_^  
  
Seto: Rickaraque 'em, firecrack 'em, sis-boom-ba! ESS, ESS, ra ra raa! ^_^ Yay!  
  
RG: Yay! ^_^ Alright, now that we've seen to absolutely everything, we can end the show!  
  
Seto: Wait! What abouts the other chars?  
  
RG/Seto: *Look at any leftover chars tied to the wall (Tristain comes to mind, as does Joey in his 'playpen')*  
  
RG: *Shrugs* They'll be fine. I'm that they'll find SOME way to untie those ancient aboriginal knots of death-wisdom.  
  
Seto: ^_^ You're right!  
  
RG: Hey, wait a sec, before we go, I'd like to just tell something to everyone who got a char today.  
  
People: *Gather around*  
  
RG: First of all, their should be a room full of character kibble somewhere in this building - you'll find it if you want it. Next, if you want to make sure you don't lose your char, the *coughcoughnon-existentcoughcough* company that manufactures the Chibinizer will gladly pay for them to get a tattoo in their ear and maybe even a microchip. Anyway, that's our show! I've got to go change Seto back to glompable size! ^_^ *Runs off with Seto*  
  
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- ~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~~-~-~-  
  
RG's End-of-Fic Authoress Notes: *Brushes sweat off forehead* Whew, it took me three days to write this. In MS Word it's FOURTEEN PAGES LONG! *Pant* Sorry, but I'm tired, my two little cousins just left yesterday mourning and they were driving me crazy for the past week. Not only that, but it's 11:27 p.m. Anyway, I really hope you enjoy my final part for this fic. Sorry it took so long, but I had stuff to do. Also, I'm sorry if it's not that funny, but I'm tired, I was tired the whole time I was working on this and I still am, so you can't blame me. Anyway (again), please R&R. I'll be working on the next chapters for my other two fics tomorrow, maybe. Also, my short fic, 'Chibi House of Horrors' is sort of like the after this fic type of thing. You should check it out. Well, thanks for all your great reviews. I'm about to put this up, so I'd better stop typing and start uploading.  
  
Seto: Bwye-bwye! ^_^  
  
RG: See ya! ^_^   
  
~ RG and a Soon Not to Be Chibi Seto 


End file.
